deadspin.com | Lauren Theisen

Sports Blogger

I'm Not Saying The Broncos Put A Hit Out On Joe Flacco, But...

This is all pretty suspicious, no? After last week’s Denver Broncos loss, wide receiver Emmanuel Sanders said, among other criticisms, “We need to call better plays.” He then quickly disappeared off the team in a trade with San Francisco. Now, after the Broncos lost again on Sunday in a heartbreaker...

by Lauren Theisen|joe flacco

|Mon Oct 28 2019

Even When Aaron Rodgers Slips Up, He's Spectacular

Even with Patrick Mahomes stuck on the sideline, Sunday night’s game between the Chiefs and the Packers played out as an entertaining battle of offenses that kept matching each other blow for blow. But in a fight between the recently un-retired Matt Moore and the god Aaron Rodgers, it was only a mat...

by Lauren Theisen|Aaron Rodgers

|Mon Oct 28 2019

Deadspin Up All Night: We May Still Have Time

Thank you for continuing to support Deadspin. Make the rest of your weekend count....

by Lauren Theisen|duan

|Sun Oct 27 2019

deadspin.com | Lauren TheisenDeshaun Watson Got Kicked In The Frickin' Eye And Still Threw A Touchdown

Texans QB Deshaun Watson can get you out of your seat at a moment’s notice, but he might have outdone himself while throwing a go-ahead fourth quarter touchdown in his team’s game against the Raiders on Sunday.Watson dropped back with his team down four and facing first-and-goal with six-and-a-half ...

by Lauren Theisen|deshaun watson

|Sun Oct 27 2019

The Broncos Played Like Cowards And Joe Flacco Is Pissed

Jacoby Brissett once again proved himself to be a trustworthy starter on Sunday, leading his Colts to a 5-2 record with a 15-13 late comeback win against the Broncos. Adam Vinatieri got the points that notched the victory, but it was Brissett who made one of the weekend’s best plays anywhere on a fo...

by Lauren Theisen|denver broncos

|Mon Oct 28 2019

Max Scherzer Can't Go Tonight, So The Nationals Are Turning To, Um, Joe Ross?

What was going to be a marquee Game 5 pitching rematch on Sunday night between the Astros’ Gerrit Cole and the Nationals’ Max Scherzer has taken a bizarre left turn, as Scherzer won’t be healthy enough to get on the mound for Washington. In a shock announcement this afternoon, manager Davey Martinez...

by Lauren Theisen|Washington Nationals

|Sun Oct 27 2019

The Bears Missed A Field Goal To Lose A Game

The Chicago Bears have some *ahem* history with missed field goals, and the failure of Cody Parkey in last season’s playoffs clearly haunted the psyche of coach Matt Nagy all summer. But while this miss—by replacement kicker Eddy Pineiro to lose 17-16 against the Chargers—may not be as significant a...

by deadspin.com | Lauren TheisenLauren Theisen|chicago bears

|Sun Oct 27 2019

Bears Fans Boo Team Off The Field After Offense Freezes At The Goal Line

Is this football? I think it’s supposed to be football, but what I’m seeing is an especially glitchy game of Madden I need to turn off and turn back on again. And the fans in Chicago seem to agree with me. Heading into halftime against the Chargers, down 7-6 with 45 seconds remaining in the quarter,...

by Lauren Theisen|chicago bears

|Sun Oct 27 2019

Flea Flickers Are Out. Double Reverse Flea Flickers Are In.

Yeah, sure, it’s possible for a team to score a touchdown on a boring old flea flicker, but if you could jazz things up by scoring on an Ultra Spectacular Jet Sweep Double Flea Flicker Reverse™️ instead, why wouldn’t you? That’s what the Rams were clearly thinking today in England against the Bengal...

by Lauren Theisen|Trick plays

|Sun Oct 27 2019

Where's Alge Crumpler?

...

by Lauren Theisen|matt schaub

|Sun Oct 27 2019

Even Knicks Fans Already Love Tacko Fall

The “We Want Tacos” chant is, oddly, not even all that uncommon at basketball games, given the wide variety of food promotions that exist for when home teams hit certain accomplishments. But at Madison Square Garden, a variation on this chant—the singular form—emerged from a Knicks blowout loss on S...

by Lauren Theisen|tacko fall

|Sun Oct 27 2019

Alex Bregman Let Out All His Frustration With One Booming Swing

It seems likely that nobody in the World Series was more pissed off than Astros third baseman Alex Bregman heading into Game 4. The ’Stros’ top hitter in the regular season was only 1-for-13 in the first three games of the Fall Classic. His lone positive contribution was a meaningless dinger in a 12...

by Lauren Theisen|deadspin.com | Lauren Theisenalex bregman

|Sun Oct 27 2019

Classic Rock, Ranked

Kelsey said she saw the film Yesterday on a plane. I said I didn’t understand why “Eleanor Rigby” was such a popular Beatles song. This being Deadspin, we have, after hours of yelling at each other in Slack, reached the natural endpoint of this, which is a democratically produced staff ranking of cl...

by Lauren Theisen|underexplained lists

|Thu Oct 24 2019

Jarvis Landry Guarantees Victory Against The Patriots, Quickly Regrets It

The 2-4 Cleveland Browns have a massively intimidating task ahead of them this Sunday, as they travel to New England to take on the undefeated Patriots. This is a team that, when they took on the league’s other remaining undefeated team in Santa Clara three weeks ago, got crushed by a score of 31-3....

by Lauren Theisen|Cleveland Browns

|Thu Oct 24 2019

Alex Bregman Was So Close To Stopping Everything

It’s obviously hyperbole to say that a misplay on a tough grounder lost the Astros Game 2 of the World Series. But that six-run seventh inning from the Nationals that broke the 2-2 tie and led them to a 12-3 win was such an intense morale-sapper—for both the Houston team and the formerly rowdy crowd...

by Lauren Theisen|alex bregman

|Thu Oct 24 2019

Report: Sam Darnold's Toenail Removal Procedure Was "Pretty Gross"

Toenail is the new seeing ghosts is the new spleen is the new mononucleosis. Add to the never-ending list of Sam Darnold’s bizarre ailments a toenail that had to be removed on Tuesday, after the Jets QB’s foot got stepped on during his team’s spooky loss to the Patriots on Monday. Head coach Adam G...

by Lauren Theisen|new york jets

|Wed Oct 23 2019

David Pastrnak Is Doing Scary Things With His Stick And I Don't Like It

A PSA: This blog is rated R for frozen violence, scenes of intense terror, and sadistic torture of a goalie.Boston Bruins winger David Pastrnak has spent the early part of this season menacing the NHL, and the league leader in goals claimed more victims in a Tuesday night win over the Maple Leafs, w...

by Lauren Theisen|david pastrnak

|Wed Oct 23 2019

Surprise, Surprise: Masai Ujiri Won't Be Charged For Allegedly "Concussing" Sheriff's Deputy After Winning NBA Finals

In a statement almost perfectly timed with the beginning of the defending champion Toronto Raptors’ season, the Alameda County District Attorney’s Office has announced that team president Masai Ujiri won’t be charged for his role in an altercation with a sheriff’s deputy that happened when he tried ...

by Lauren Theisen|toronto raptors

|Wed Oct 23 2019

Deadspin Up All Night: Free As A Breeze

Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Enjoy the baseball....

by Lauren Theisen|duan

|Tue Oct 22 2019

Lawsuit Accuses Oscar De La Hoya Of Sexual Assault

Former top-rated boxer and current chairman and CEO of Golden Boy Promotions Oscar De La Hoya has been sued for sexual assault and battery by an anonymous woman in Los Angeles County Superior Court. The plaintiff says in her lawsuit that she was sexually assaulted by the promoter and ex-boxer in Nov...

by Lauren Theisen|Oscar de la Hoya

|Tue Oct 22 2019

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